Do You Have Self Confidence

posted in: Meditation | 0

self confidenceI was recently working on a guided meditation program for turning self-doubt into self confidence, and considering what would cause someone to acquire such a pattern. When trying to answer questions about how dysfunctional patterns get started, it often helps to look at the result — there’s usually a payoff, no matter how crazy it may seem.

Self doubt most often creeps up at decision points. Whenever we make a commitment, we can get into trouble. Decisions can be dangerous, or so it would seem.

The Causes of Lack of Self-Confidence

Let’s say you’re a child growing up in a family where the grownups are not particularly tolerant of mistakes. Perhaps the parents think that coming down hard on a child will help them learn to do better. Or maybe they’re just angry, and tend toward doling out punishment at the slightest offense. Mistakes in that setting can be painful.

Nobody want’s to get hurt, and a child in that situation will quickly learn not to take risks. When faced with any kind of decision where the outcome is uncertain, they will try to avoid taking any action at all. That learned behavior quickly goes unconscious in the child’s developing brain.

Cut to adulthood, and we find a person who falters when faced with decisions, or challenged by any kind of new task. They may be otherwise perfectly capable of learning a new skill or forging ahead on an unknown path, but the old unconscious fear of punishment comes in to keep them from taking a risk. We call it self-doubt, or lack of confidence.

The guided meditation I developed for turning self-doubt into self confidence works to take the charge off of mistakes. Instead, it fosters a culture of acceptance, where mistakes are considered a normal part of learning and growth. It’s reprogramming, and it can be helpful.

If you’re dealing with a lack of confidence check out the meditation, and also these Bach Flower Remedies: cerato – which is the remedy for distrust of self, self-doubt; larch, which is used for lack of confidence; and scleranthus, for indecision, or being “on the fence”. They all work.

Can’t decide which remedy to or guided meditation to use? Like I said: scleranthus.

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